Today, I have to admit it :))) I am feeling slightly in a bad mood.

It has been 2 days in a row that my alarm is waking me up in the middle of a dream. I am not someone to remember my dreams for a strange reason. I am usually pretty good at getting up straight away. But these last few days have been a struggle. I can be a nightmare in the morning and was moaning to my partner: “aweeeee I CAN’T GET UPPPPPP! I AM TIRRREEEDDDDD”. His answer was: “Come on, don’t think you are tired and can’t get up as you are going to set this mood up for the day”. ERHHH, easily said than done! Then, he sung this beautiful song from Frank Sinatra:

Smile though your heart is aching

The Very Best of Frank Sinatra

The Very Best of Frank Sinatra (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Smile even though it’s breaking
When there are clouds in the sky, you’ll get by
If you smile through your fear and sorrow
Smile and maybe tomorrow
You’ll see the sun come shining through for you 

Light up your face with gladness
Hide every trace of sadness
Although a tear may be ever so near
That’s the time you must keep on trying
Smile, what’s the use of crying?
You’ll find that life is still worthwhile
If you just smile.

I am very lucky as my partner is a great singer! He has a beautiful voice. I have to say, the song uplifted my heart! I am thinking that perhaps it would have been a different story if he was singing like a “casserole!” Haha. The literate translation would be: singing like a saucepan. Don’t ask me, I don’t have a clue why French people are using this expression! Or may be I am the only French idiot to not know about it 🙂

The whole morning was a joy to go by. I worked at the Sunshine Bakery in Chapel Allerton, executed my duties with delight and then:1.30 PM, badamoum…tiredness hit me again. I didn’t have any lunch yet at the time and I think that I was really hungry.

I passed a shop, bought some ingredients that I fancied for my lunch (tried not to over-thinking about it, of course!) and then gone home. By the time it was 14.00PM (I took my breakfast at 7.00 AM). While I was preparing my food, I nibbled on everything that I was putting on the plate. At the time when my meal was ready, I wasn’t necessarily hungry but was happy to sit down and carried on eating. After eating my whole plate, the image of a fabulous Clementine, Vanilla and Cinnamon home-made custard tart popped into my mind. “Oh YESSSSS! there is the left over of a tart that Pete made for our pizza party night with our neighbour”. The thing is, I have been telling me the same thing for the last few days…The tart was still pretty big when it hit back the shelves of our fridge…but then got thinner and thinner. Which I do not beat myself up but I can’t stop thinking that having a big piece of cake and ice cream  (vanilla that we added dark chocolate / peanut butter & ginger cookies to it) every single day, is not necessarily part of a balanced diet…

My aim is really to eat a bit of everything and not depriving myself. I truly believe that allowing myself to have things that I fancy, I will not bother with overeating them when occasions are arising. And I feel that more and more, it is the case.I  am not there yet but I feel that because I know that I can have everything that I want, when I want, my mind and my cravings for specific food are slowly decreasing.

However, there are few points that I have noticed that I would like to share:

– Going without food for more than 6 hours is not doing me any favour.

– Having cupboards full of cakes, sweets, ice cream and so on is not helping for NOT “succomber aux desirs du sucre!” (falling for the desire of having sugar). It is best for me to enjoy treats at special occasions and not keeping them at home. 1) It just make things simpler and easier. 2) special treats are even more special when eating time to time rather than everyday. Full stop. When treats are not there, they are not there and I can switch my mind to other non-food related activities.

– I have to make sure of what a balanced diet look like. Does it look like having cakes and ice cream everyday? HUMMMMM….probably not….

– I have to find alternatives for healthier type of sweetness when I do fancy some. Lately I had some Clementines with a bit of cream or had some apples cooked with cinnamon and ghee (clarified butter. Of course I will not go into details why I am choosing ghee to cook with :))) . I 100% enjoyed those two treats and they made me feel good.

– Sugar is addictive but I also have to take responsibility for my actions. I am the one who is putting the extra portions in my mouth. No one else to blame neither the pack of sugar or cookies hidden in the cupboard.

– Not eating the same thing every single day is going to be beneficial for me. Eating the same thing over and over again, everyday hasn’t help me in reaching optimum health. So I have to get lessons from past experiences.

– As Albert Einstein said: “Insanity is doing the same things over and over again but expecting different results”. 

– Decreasing my attention on food and increasing passion for non-food related activities is going to help me to break free of my unharmonious relationship with food.

These were my thoughts of the day! I do hope you will get something valuable from this post or simply have a laugh.

Lots of Love


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